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Myself am hungry for wisdom from others about handling life’s midpoint hurdles, for example existential reckonings, diminishing importance, growing a neck akin to a surrealist painting plus a fresh interest regarding sunny relocation programs. Recently, I came across the chef’s comments about hitting fifty in an interview: “To thrive in life’s later stages, you must cut out distractions,” he explained. “Spend time with positive individuals. I steer clear of downbeat types – ‘energy vampires’ – and am learning to decline more often.”

Initially, I wondered: isn’t this contradictory about evading pessimists and honing one’s rejection skills? Could that imply he needs to dodge his own tendencies? I get it – such remarks define us negative types, and yes, I’m one of them. Although in our community we actually prefer the expression “energy vampire”. Refrain from using “downer” or “spoil-sport” – these comparisons to everyday gear are insulting; we possess sentiments (though often pessimistic). If forced, I’d agree to “gloomy soft cover”.

It’s possible you’re also a member. Are you less the life and soul of the party and more its accountant or undertaker? Does your thorough reply to casual greetings make people step back nervously? Do you greet “fun” activity suggestions with an expression that makes you look like you’ve swallowed a slug? Do you strongly identify with Eeyore; has a psychic ever told you your aura is grey?

If this describes you, you’re in our ranks, and that’s acceptable. Although modern wisdom pushes folks to discard “sapping” companions, I contend we bring substantial worth. I reckon a mood hoover would have said something discouraging – or at least made a slug-swallowing face – when Jamie described his plan to write a kids’ book with an Australian First Nation main character without consulting Indigenous communities, which could have prevented a whole lot of problems, upset and offence. That level of honest feedback is rare among “upbeat” individuals.